搞笑——一个吝啬的家伙

Mattandhiswifelivedinthecountry.Mattwasverystingyandhatedspendingmoney.Onedayafaircametothenearbytown."Let’sgotothefair,Matt,"hiswifesaid."Wehaven’tbeenanywhereforalongtime."Mattthoughtaboutthisforawhile.Heknewhewouldhavetospendmoneyatthefair.Atlasthesaid,"Allright,butI’mnotgoingtospendmuchmoney.We’lllookatthings,butwewon’tbuyanything."Theywenttothefairandlookedatallthethingstobuy.ThereweremanythingsMatt’swifewantedtobuy,buthewouldnotletherspendanymoney.Then,inanearbyfield,theysawasmallairplane."Funflights!"thenoticesaid,"$10for10minutes.Matthadneverbeeninanairplaneandhewantedtogoonafunflight.However,hedidn’twanttohavetopayforhiswife,aswell."I’veonlygot$10,"hetoldthepilot."Canmywifecomewithmeforfree?"Thepilotwasn’tsellingmanytickets,sohesaid,"I’llmakeabargainwithyou.Ifyourwifedoesn’tscreamorshout,shecanhaveafreeflight."Mattagreed,andgotintothesmallairplanewithhiswife.Thepilottookoffandmadehisairplanedoallkindsofthings.Atonemomentitwasflyingupsidedown.Whentheplanelanded,thepilotsaid,"0.K.yourwifedidn’tmakeasound.Shecanhaveherridefree.""Thankyou,"Mattsaid."Itwasn’teasyforher,youknow,especiallywhenshefellout."麦特和妻子住在乡下。麦特很吝啬,讨厌花钱。一天附近的镇子逢集。“我们去赶集,麦特,”妻子说。“我们很久没出去了。”麦特想了一会儿。他知道在集市上一定得花钱。最后他说:“好吧,但我不打算花太多钱。我们只看不买。”他们去集市,看看所有可买的东西。有很多东西麦特的妻子想买,但麦特不让她买。然后在附近的露天场地,他们看到一架小飞机。“有趣的飞行。”海报上写着,“10分钟10美元。”麦特从来没有乘过飞机,所以他想乘一次小飞机。然而他不想付他妻子的票钱。“我只带了10美元,”他对飞机驾驶员说,“我妻子能免费和我一起乘飞机吗?”驾驶员没卖出多少票,所以他说:“我和你做个交易。如果你妻子不尖叫,也不叫出声来,她就能免费飞行。”麦特同意了,他和妻子一起登上了飞机。飞机起飞了,驾驶员让飞机做出各种各样的动作。有一会儿飞机倒着飞行。飞机着陆时,驾驶员说,“好吧,你妻子没发出任何声响。她就不用买飞机票了。”“谢谢,”麦特说,“你知道,这对她不容易,特别当她刚才掉下去的时候。”
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